We started Pui Pui on violin about three weeks ago. It is something that she's been begging for a long time. Although Yan Yan is an accomplished young violin player now, it didn't start out easy at all. There has been lots of moments of tensions, confusions, frustrations and anger over violin practice and learning. In retrospect, it was mainly caused by my high and unrealistic expectations, pride, selfish goals that totally blinded my heart to understand a young child's mind and thought. By God's mercy and grace, in spite of the damage I did, Yan Yan kept on to it. When Yin Yin started at 8, I was more lay back and relax, but was still critical at times. Yin Yin choose to press on, time after time, at his own pace.
I didn't think I would put Pui Pui on violin, simply because I was not confident that I could handle the stress and my selfish expectation well and in a God-glorifying manner. But she begged for it, again and again. We decided to let her try.
This time around, I feel that I am more prepared. I am more ready to tell her "it's okay, we will try again tomorrow" when she is frustrated over a new skill, or "Let's just do a little bit and make it fun" when she doesn't want to practice. After all these years of pushing and pulling, I realized that the most powerful motivation for kids to learn is passion. Violin or not, it is comforting to know that our kids will never fall out of God's sovereign plan, even when I mess up.
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